For some reason, today I felt a surge of rage towards all awards ever. This is because I am serene and peaceful person full of useful feelings. Anyway, after the surge of rage I thought, "I'll have my own damn awards! That'll show them!"
Note: as always, it's not entirely clear who "them" is, or just…why any of this.
But then, I realized that I would have to come up with some really excellent award categories. Also, I would have to abolish rules. Or make them. Same thing, really. Like, I don't care what year anything was published. And maybe, I get to say everything and be in charge of everything in the world and whether it's OK or not.
There, I am liking awards better already.
So, my first award goes to…Holes! It wins in the category of "Books that are really freaking good, maybe you forgot and should go back and read them because, oh my God."
Congratulations, Holes! You are the first-ever winner of The Diamond in the Window award, which comes with—a metaphorical diamond!!!! You are so lucky!!!!!
Feel free to award your own awards (?) in this category in the comments. Because I have a feeling there will be more awards coming. That's right, lots of awards, in the very best types of categories. I'm working on it.
8 thoughts on “It’s Award Season!”
They should have elected you Pope.
I. loved. this. post!
I have NEVER read Holes. I have it in a Barnes and Noble bag on my desk. NOW it has an AWARD! I will be sure to read it!
My award in this category is:
I had to pick out of a hat because there are MANY that fit into this category.
The Award for “Book that should be dropped from planes into every high school in America because holy crap” goes to: Beauty Queens!
Wait, also middle schools
The dialogue between Dido and Captain Hughes near the end of ‘The stolen lake’ deserves an award for sheer brilliance. It’s clever and funny and utterly improbable while also being utterly convincing. I re-read it the other night and I just had to tell somebody about it.
This reminds me of Horn Book’s Mind the Gap awards. I remember the last novel in Gerald Morris’ Squire’s Tales series won “The Happiest Book in Which Everyone Dies,” and I totally agreed with that.
I hereby bestow the Award for Best YA Novel No One Has Ever Heard Of About A Sensitive Young Girl Who Wants to Write (Only It Was Reissued As Adult Fiction, But Really It’s Still YA. Really.) to A LONG WAY FROM VERONA by Jane Gardam.
Honorary Mention (without the parenthetical reissue note): A ROOM MADE OF WINDOWS by Eleanor Cameron
I’m going to give the award to the best really long series that you can read and read and feel like you are practically never going to run out of books and also share with your young people and they will enjoy too, to Discworld by Terry Pratchett.