Sad, so Sad

We all know that life is, more or less, going to have a fairly sizable proportion of shit to it. I like to think that I take my periodic periods of shit with good grace, but just because I like to think that doesn't mean it's true, alas.

We are just now emerging from a fairly prolonged shit storm (forgive me, if you can, the incessant bad language, but oh so truly that is what it felt like). Day after day after week after month of difficulties small and large, and here is the one that finds its sad way here.

I feel like I ought to put a trigger warning here. Uh—trigger warning?

Because: bed bugs.

Oh, don't worry, they're gone. And it wasn't even $5,000 this time. But O, my fellow book-lovers, this is the third time. The third time of cleaning. And exterminating. And going through endless books. And one time seeing a horrible tiny bed bug baby scurrying its foul way across a page from the Dictionary of Slang.

And, and, and…I think I can't pick up books off the street anymore, you guys. Or even so much buy them used. Or (sob!) borrow them from the library.

Librarians—I am not trying to be a jerk here. And no, of course we don't know exactly how we got them.

Except that they've been concentrated in the room of the person who travels the least. And who has the most books.

Is this even a literary topic? No. Except: library sales, you guys! You know how we feel about library sales! And random finds! And the book gods who drop a book on you when you most need it! So here's the thing: fear not. This is not only a moment of mourning. It offers a solution. A sad solution, but still—a solution.


I know you don't know what it is. I wish I didn't know what it was. It's a ZappBug killer. If you put books into it, you can heat them to 120° for an hour, and kill any bed bug eggs. Oh how I wish I didn't know this. But I do know it.

So I have a solution. But it still sort of feels like it's breaking my heart, like there's something lost from just grabbing a book off of someone's stoop and then curling up on the couch to read it. But a solution is something, right?

How are you all? Staying out of the shit raining down, I hope!


6 thoughts on “Sad, so Sad

  1. Oh, dear. I am so sorry! What a pain in the you-know-what. And, an hour of waiting is totally a solution that you can live with. Really. I am hoping that the shit storm is over for you. Mine will be when I am done with the grammar class that I am taking, but is obviously not doing any good for me. Look up there where I began a sentence with a conjunction. Ask me if I care…I dare you. Sending you good vibes and bug-free beds forever.


  2. So sorry – bed bugs truly do take over your life and suck all the joy out of it for awhile as you look at everything with suspicion in the aftermath. Hoping the broken relationships with books will be mended.


  3. You poor thing. I wonder if freezing them works too? We live in the country and have a big standup freezer that my daughter uses to treat old books with mildew/fungus issues.


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