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OK, I Lied—But Just Because I Had to Do this One We Recommend, with update

Published on May 5, 2018 by marciaworksite11 Comments

OK, yeah, I'm out of the business, I don't do that anymore—but there's one last heist…and I'm going to need all of your incredible skills.

Here's what happened. A loved one, who is also a social worker, called with this situation. (I will condense and paraphrase.)

She works in a public elementary school where there has been a recent spate of 5th grade girl-on-girl emotional violence in the form of hacking each other's Instagram (and other social media, I imagine?) accounts, as well as emails sent that include unpleasant graphic sexual commentary. Yes, yes—this is terrible, but that's just the context.

Some of the perpetrators were caught, and brought to our friend the social worker (praise be!) to get straightened out. Conversations were had. One girl—a 5th grader, remember—is an extremely beautiful, smart, physically developed Latina. She looks, in the words of the social worker, like a gorgeous 16 year old. In the most recent meeting she wept. "No one ever talks about anything but my face and my body. The only thing the boys in the class talk about is my body. They talk about my body parts all the time."

Ugh. Ugh ugh ugh. All these things working together—children, rape culture, sexism, race (I have no doubt), social media, 5th grade, being a person. But for us the question is, what can we give this child to read? She feels alone, but she is not alone.

See why I had to take this one?

My thoughts on this are varied and possibly not all that helpful. First I thought of Speak, but that is too grown up, too much acting as though what people see when they look at her is the truth.

Then I thought of going in a whole other direction with an old favorite, First Test: Protector of the Small. This is the story of the first girl who trains as a page. It is about learning your own power.

Then I thought of—ok, don't laugh—the greatest of them all, Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret. Because who remembers Laura? The girl who they socially torture because she has big breasts? Whom no one will speak to? But yeah, she's not the center of the book.

OK, people, I know I'm quitting—we're all quitting!—but I need you now! Or really, this kid needs you. She needs a book to remind her that she is not alone, that she is who she thinks she is. Bonus points if you can offer her a Latinx author. Extra bonus points if you can think of a book to make the boys in her class shut up and learn something about other people's humanity.

You all remember how to do this, right? Put your ideas in the comments, social worker will look here, books will make their way to the girl—let's do this!

UPDATE: Chestnut strongly believes that a book should be gotten for the boys as well, the ones who are spending all their time talking about this girl's "body parts," something, perhaps, that might remind them of the humanity of others? She wants the teacher to be able to have them all read it. In a curriculum this might be hard to fit, but I do think it is an excellent idea.

OMG We Still Recommend!: Adventures with One-Parent Families

Published on February 19, 2018 by marciaworksite4 Comments

It’s We Recommend! In which we post a request that's been sent to us, and do our best to get that person the right book. Know a kid who needs a book to read? Send us (thediamondinthewindow (at) gmail (dot) com) his or her likes, dislikes, favorites, quirks, and any other reading information that might be helpful, and we will think on it, and pose it to our oh-so-helpful readers. And look in the comments—all the best recommendations are there.

Oh, it has been a long, long time! Books have come and gone, blogs have vanished, and I have been doing a bunch of other things, but at the back of my mind ye olde Diamond in the Window has been simmering. And then I got a real live email in my inbox, asking us to recommend a book, and I thought: yes! In this difficult and troubling world, of course I want to recommend books if I can. So let's get the old gang together and see if we can figure out a book for this reader.

Recently I’ve been bemoaning the lack of children’s books that do not fetishize the nuclear family—and I thought, I know who might be able to help!

So, brief background, recently separated from my husband. Our son is eight. He loves the Avatar: The Last Airbender graphic novels, Wayside School. He’s enjoyed a few Roald Dahl books but not enough that we’ve read them repeatedly, and he still loves picture books—Island Boy by Barbara Cooney is a favorite right now. He likes adventure and humor and a little bit of magic, and self-sufficient kid protagonists. I’d really love to have something wonderful to read with him that features a single parent or divorced parents or same-sex parents as something unremarkable, you know? Not a book ABOUT divorce, but a book where some kid with divorced parents has a fabulous adventure. I would so appreciate suggestions!

Now this is a challenge! It's tough—a lot of books that have one parent, but are too mature for an 8-year-old—To Kill a Mockingbird, for instance, One Hundred Spaghetti Strings,and When You Reach Me all fall under that category. So great! But maybe more for someone who is 10, or even 12? Then there are books that are just right age-wise and have a single parent, but part of the story arc is about matching that parent up again to a mate: Half-Magic by Edward Eager fits here nicely, and it is wonderful, but I am not sure that this is a message that is comfortable. The Roald Dahl books make a lot of sense, but our kid here is not loving them. So I have come up with these old school books that I think might just possibly work. Maybe.

Oh how I love The Magician's Nephew. Digory Kirke lives with his mother only, who is very sick (so that's a bit of a sticky situation) and his foolish terrible uncle. It's magical and wonderful and I still think about the magic rings. So—maybe. Though the sick mom thing is troubling.

And then there's this:

I think I never knew that this was a sequel to Freaky Friday, but it didn't matter—it was great. The narrator is Annabel, but Boris, who is a major character, lives with his mom and is the hub around which the story revolves. And it's funny, and magical, and terrific.

But! I am 100% sure that there are more modern books that would be even more perfect. So, readers, if there are any of you out there still: help a family out! What should this 8-year-old read?

We Recommend: A Really Great Book, Please

Published on May 2, 2017 by marciaworksite9 Comments

Well, friends and foes—Ok, probably not foes, to be honest—we have a challenge. I mean, grownups (most of us) recommending books to non–grownups is already a challenge. But this one has more terrifying heights and dizzying abysses (?) than most: I fear there may be an inverse relationship between someone's need for a book and the ease with which we find the right one. But what are challenges for if not to be pushed against, and maybe even overcome? Forward! To the request!

My son is an 8th grade boy who likes fast paced but deep stories (not boring) and is struggling with feeling like he doesn't matter to any of his friends. He has loved over the years: Rick Riordan, Harry Potter, Hunger Games, Maze Runner, all David Levithan. Loved The Martian and is currently reading Lovely Bones. Likes pathos and feelings but also action and adventure and a good story. Is currently loving the entire Marvel franchise.

This one hit me right in the feelings. It is oh-so-crappy to feel like you don't matter to your friends, on top of the various difficulties of being in 8th grade, and in the world at all (am I leaning maudlin? I fear so.). But having a book makes everything better, and having the right book is even better than that.

The thing that occurred to me first, and hard, was Terry Pratchett. Funny! Smart! Fast! Silly! Heartfelt! But the question lingers: which one? I went to the expert, ie: Chestnut, for guidance. She says this:

And the excellent thing about this, is if it's a hit, there are more more more!

In any case, there are probably other, perfect books out there waiting that we don't know anything about—books that would be perfect for this particular person. If you know of one, put it in the comments!

We Recommend: Social Justice for a Teenage Girl

Published on March 10, 2017 by marciaworksite7 Comments

I have no idea what is happening with our sudden spate of We Recommends, but I am happy about it (even though I may have forgotten how to spell recommend, or at least, I've lost my confidence about it). If you know a kid who needs a book to read, send us (thediamondinthewindow (at) gmail (dot) com) his or her likes, dislikes, favorites, quirks, and any other reading information that might be helpful, and we will think on it, and pose it to our oh-so-helpful readers. And look in the comments—all the best recommendations are there.

For those of you who like a challenge, we are here for you! Here we go, with an email from a devoted aunt, whose niece is about to turn 17 and requests a book for her birthday:

She's read and loved Jacqueline Woodson's books, including, recently, Another Brooklyn.

In life she cares about social justice. Recently said she she might want to go into politics which if she does, wow! She's also liked baking and seems to like shopping. Is going to be a peer leader at her school next year – something she worked hard to compete for.

I think she wants novels now, which is great. She's an avid reader.

And not to get too tedious and demographic, but, I think it'd actually be cool if she read a book with an Irish, or part Irish, female main character, or even character somewhere! And another with a Jewish, or part Jewish, female main character, or again, a character somewhere. The book doesn't have to be a social argument, that's not what I'm saying. Not sure how many of those titles have ever crossed her path. Or if they have, not for a very very very long time. Maybe for the first, Charming Billy? I've never read Allegra Goodman – one of hers?

But maybe those are too old for her? I don't know. Hmm….

Sure, you're thinking, social justice for a teenage girl is a piece of cake. But then you add on all the things and you feel like: eek, does the right book exist anywhere? That elusive beast, the perfectly right book?

When I first wrote back to her, I thought about That Night by Alice McDermott, and also Allegra Goodman's sci-fi novel. Neither of these felt just right. Then I thought about The Poisonwood Bible, but again—close, but no cigar. Social justice, but not the demographic particularity (that while not essential, is still a fun challenge). I thought about A Tree Grows in Brooklyn, but that might be too young? Ditto All of a Kind Family. Then I thought about the excellent story collection, Fools, by Joan Silber, but a story collection might not make sense?

Oh! OK, this is all over the news, and maybe she already read it, and it doesn't correspond to anything she's asking about, but here's my crazy left-field guess:

Maybe? Possibly?

Anyway, I bet many of you have better ideas than I, and if any of you hit all these requirements? You win a prize.*

*Fair warning: It is possible that the prize will be the satisfaction of knowing you've done an amazing thing.